Stream of Consciousness

    In January of 2009, I sat one night thinking of things I could do help boost both my writing career and help with the finances of the house. I had heard of people making money off of blogging so I though, "Hey that is something I should check into." I did the research and found that it really wasn't all that great of a money maker but the idea of blogging stuck with me. After a few days of mulling the idea, I decided it was something I wanted to try. What could it hurt to try it?
    Somehow though I always fell short of writing my first blog out. I would write on it and then set it aside and then go back to it. Here it is May of 2010 and I still haven't finished the first blog I started. After a while I realized I was over thinking it. I would have all these great ideas go through my head, an interior monologue of sorts, that would be wonderful to blog about but I would never write them down because I would tell myself I needed to finish that first blog I started. Well as of yesterday morning I threw that idea out the window, decided I was going to start fresh and this time I would finish my first blog.
    One of the main reasons that blogging appealed to me was the fact that I am continuously writing in my head, hence the interior monologue comment above. When I was in high school we had to write a poem title "I AM" and in the poem we had to describe ourselves through 7 different items - a piece of clothing, type of food, style of writing, type of music, a plant, a color, and one of the four elements. My mother helped me to identify many of the items and it was thanks to her that I learned what Stream of Consciousness was. Stream of Consciousness is a style of writing but it is also defined as an interior monologue or the continuous unedited chronological flow of conscious experience through the mind. Well both of those describe me! Sometimes my head feels so full of thoughts that if I don't write them down I feel as if my head will explode!
    So what has changed that has lead me to this fresh start – oh so much has changed since the idea first appealed to me. Right now is a particularly tough time in my life. From day to day I do not know what will come next and I need an outlet before my mind gets the best of me! I have never been good about talking to people about my feelings or sharing my thoughts but if I was asked to write it down, well then that I could do. Writing comes naturally to me. So hold on tight as you are about to experience my emotional roller coaster and maybe I can get through everything intact and better than I was before.
Natalie